But We're Hungry
by Gwendolena
Summary: Tony and Aldrich keep eating the edible decorations. Pepper gets frustrated with both. Fluffy one-shot. Tony x Pepper x Aldrich.


**A/N: Based on two prompts from the imagineyourotp blog on tumblr: Imagine your OTP decorating a Christmas tree. Person A keeps stealing all the candy canes. / Imagine your OTP decorating the Christmas tree and Person A eats the popcorn garland as B strings it around the tree.**

**I combined the two prompts to make it OT3 friendly for my own intents and purposes: Person A & Person C keep eating the edible decorations; Person B gets frustrated with both.**

**Hey, the heat of summer gets me thinking about Christmas. So sue me.**

**Additionally, I do not own Pepper, Aldrich, or Tony. They belong to Marvel. (Though it would be pretty fun to own an Aldrich...)**

* * *

"Pass me the box of red ornaments."

Pepper held out her hand expectantly, but grew impatient as nothing was placed in it after at least ten seconds.

"Tony?"

_Crunch._

"That better not have been an ornament."

"No no! It's fine! We're all good here!"

Knowing Tony, she doubted everything was "all good" on the other side of the tree.

The self-proclaimed genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist offered her the box whilst speaking with his mouth full. Pepper took the pack, eyeing the man dubiously.

"What are you eating?" She asked - well, more demanded of, really - him. It better not be a candy ca-

"Candy cane. Want some?"

With a loud sucking noise, he pulled the red and white striped confection from his mouth and extended it towards her. She wrinkled her nose in disapproval.

"Ew, no. God, you think with all the money you've got, you'd be a little classier."

Stepping back, Tony threw his arms up as if to say, "Ah, but you love me anyway."

"And stop eating the candy canes. We don't have very many."

"Yes, ma'am." He mock-saluted her, receiving a roll of the eyes from the strawberry blonde.

Not a minute later, she heard Tony from around the tree.

"Candy cane, Smaug?"

"I thought Pepper said not to eat anymore of those. And quit it with the dragon jokes."

"Hey, what she doesn't know won't kill her."

"Tony." She warned.

"Yes?" A faux innocent tone had filtered into his voice, and she sighed in exasperation.

Apparently not getting the message, he returned his attention to Aldrich.

"And dude, you breathe fire. If that isn't dragon-qualifying, I don't know what is."

"Shut up, Stark."

"Hey, don't set the tree up in flames."

* * *

"Where are the candy canes?" Pepper called out, turning to glare accusingly at Tony.

"Wasn't me, I swear." The man in question held up his hands in a surrendering gesture, but Pepper swore she could see a sticky red stripe across his thumb. "Was Beowulf over there." He pointed towards Aldrich, who looked up from wrapping a small box with an indignant scowl crafted especially for Tony.

"Oh, please. I had _one_, which is not a lot if you keep in mind that you ate _two boxes_. And Beowulf was the guy who slayed the dragon, not the dragon itself."

"Don't get all literature-y on me. I was a science major, not English."

A pair of blue-gray eyes flashed orange. "So was I, but even I know that Beow-"

"Hey Aldrich, did you pop the popcorn?" Pepper interrupted, hoping to hold off the property destruction to a minimum - at least until after Christmas.

Visibly cooling off at the sound of Pepper's voice, Aldrich tore his eyes away from the infuriating Tony Stark to face their shared lover.

"Of course, Pepper. It's on the stove in the kitchen."

"Thanks. You're a sweetheart."

She stepped forward to briefly peck him on the lips, then headed into the kitchen. Behind her, she could hear Tony grumble at Aldrich.

"What kind of name is Aldrich, anyway?" He sniped.

"You didn't take such a dislike to it last night. In fact, if I remember clearly, you shouted it after I-"

"Yes yes, now stuff it, Mushu."

* * *

After a tedious couple of hours spent stabbing and pulling a needle and thread through an endless amount of popcorn, Pepper climbed the wooden stepladder in order to reach the top of the tree better.

"Feed me more of the line as I tell you to." She instructed Aldrich, not trusting Tony enough to let him help her. Instead, he'd been given the task of lighting the fireplace (which ought to keep him occupied for a while, considering he'd always gotten Pepper or Aldrich to do it for him). Aldrich nodded in response, though his gaze had noticeably drifted from her eyes to her tush, which happened to be right in his face. She waved a hand in front of his face to get his attention and did so successfully, earning a slightly flustered expression from the other.

"Go stand on the other side of the tree."

"Oh... yes, of course. Okay."

He climbed down the ladder, but not without one last glance at her lovely behind.

She didn't mind.

As if on cue, "PEPPER!"

"Ugh, what, Tony?"

"Where are the matches?"

"Sitting right on top of the logs."

"No, they're not... Oh, nevermind."

* * *

"More."

_Crunch. Crunch. Crunch._

"Aldrich?" Pepper's brow furrowed as she heard a different sort of crunching than the one earlier. To further her confusion, the blond wasn't feeding her more line like she'd told him to. What was he doing?

She climbed down the stepladder carefully, then stepped around the professionally-wrapped gifts that had been delivered and placed under the tree ten minutes ago.

_Crunch. Crunch. Crunch._

"Aldri-"

On the couch, Aldrich and Tony were seated, the flat panel TV displaying some sort of video game. The two were surprisingly quiet, mumbling quietly to each other - probably so she wouldn't hear. She came to the realization that neither had yet recognized her presence behind them and padded softly towards them.

On the carpet in front of them, a green wrapper lay discarded.

"Did you guys really open a gift before Christmas?"

Not looking away from the screen, Tony replied, "It sounds like we should say no."

Pepper rolled her eyes for what must've been the thousandth time.

"Shoot your portal... there." Aldrich nudged Tony.

"Which one?"

"The blue one."

"They're both blue, moro-"

"Light blue."

The brunet did so accordingly, and after the acquiring of a cube and the pressing of a button, both players ran through a door into two disassembly tubes, one orange and one blue. The two cheered, Tony holding up his hand for a high-five and Aldrich slamming his own palm against it triumphantly.

Pepper held up a black string off the floor.

"Wait, did you guys... eat the popcorn?"

The grins on the two men's faces quickly fell, replaced by similar expressions that, if put into words, would read "oh, shit."


End file.
